Overheard by

   Misterseed

These are exact words, overheard by Misterseed or read somewhere

 and so it came to pass that Misterseed overheard you saying .......

 

"Thats the problem with most if not all Kenyans. We believe in making money ,die and leave the world a worse place than we found it". - Anonymous, London.

 

"I have not problem telling the truth because you cannot accuse me of taking any public funds illegally" - Hon James Orengo speaking in London, March 2002.

 

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"My main was to go to parliament and prevent the government from taking tea and coffee farmers money and my dream has come true" - Hon Gatabaki speaking in London, March 2002.

 

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"He asked if I was married - he's a bit of a charmer". - Sarah Fowler, Britain's tallest women after meeting world's tallest man Hussain 27, in London.

 

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"I can say how impressed I have been, and the jury must have been, for the extraordinary care with which the police trapped these very professional criminals." - A judge, telling one of the gangsters jailed for plotting to steal £200 million diamond at Millennium Doom, London.

 

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"Too bad, I've missed Valentine's Day." - Sarah Fowler, Britain's tallest women after meeting world's tallest man Hussain 27, in London.

 

"I have never heard a defence of less merit." - A judge, telling one of the gangsters jailed for plotting to steal £200 million diamond at Millennium Doom, London.

 

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"This country, UK, is like lake Victoria where there are many fishes. I don't see the reason why people should feel jealousy of each other." - Sam Ochieng, Kenya Community Support Network, London.

 

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"I won't be here for Christmas" - The late UK musician, George Harrison phoning a friend to come and see him immediately on 14th November 2001.

 

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"I hope you have grown beyond tribal lines. You know where you are born and which tribe you belong to is an accident and you have no choice".- Hon. Kibaki, LSE, London

 

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"This country should have the death penalty for people like me" - Killer Beart, who tortured a waitress to death - testifying in a court in UK.

 

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"Political parties are like church where you are free to join any without harassment." - Hon. Mwai Kibaki, London 2001.

 

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"My husband's managers told him he was not at risk. Now he is gone." - Mrs. Curseen - wife of U.S. Postal Services worker who died of Anthrax.

 

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"Life is not how long you are going to live but it is about how long you are going to walk with God." - Rev. Isaac Thuo Ndugire, Interdenominational World Revival Ministry.

 

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"A nation at war can't organise an Olympics." - A top Olympic official, Gerhard Heiberg when asked by reporters about the February's Salt Lake City winter games.

 

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"I've got nothing to go back to New York for..... my office is gone, people I worked with are dead, our family home is wrecked, our lives destroyed." - Larry Abele, London, a British who had an office in World Trade Centre, US.

 

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"You're one of the most dishonest witnesses that I've ever seen." - UK judge Justice Laddie as he throw out spy author Allason case.

 

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"Walk with Jesus, leave John Walker to walk alone." - Evangelist Gladys Ngunyi, from Kenya preaching in London.

 

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"Anyone can do beatings and starve people. I want your unit to find new ways of torture so terrible that the screams will frighten even crows from the nests and if the person survives he will never again have a night's sleep." - Taliban secret police boss telling his men what to do.

 

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"It's gone honey, oh my, it's gone. Some men built it, then other men knocked it down."  - A teacher, Mrs. Frank, telling the husband about destroyed US World Trade Centre.

 

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"I will never touch a drop of alcohol again Mum." - UK TV star, Michael Barrymore hours before her mum passed away.

 

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"They made a big mistake, they woke the sleeping giant, they have to pay for it." - US President Bush, commenting about the World Trade Centre terrorism.

 

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"Where's the safest place in the world right now?" - "My bed in London". - Nic Robertson, British, a CNN correspondent in Afghanistan.

 

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"You need to find out why you were born. You were not born to fail. Find out where you fit in the market of living." - Dr. Odulele - Senior Pastor, Glory Bible House Church, London.

 

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"After out meeting with that Jewish lady she commented to me: 'I wish I am 20 years old, I could have given your wife a round figure (money) for you.' " - 55-year-old Rev. Paul Aderarasin, Lagos, Nigeria preaching in London.

 

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"People who did this are evil cowards and believe me, they are going to hell. I want to help get them there as quickly as I can." - An American Armed Forces recruit queuing to join the American Armed Forces.

 

"You must have a true love. I mean true love not fake love." - Evangelist Gladys Ngunyi, from Kenya preaching in London.

 

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"I am in a dream. I never believed that one day the United States would come to pay a price for its support for Israel." - A Palestinian gunman Mustafa, 24 dancing after hearing the news of terrorists hitting America's World Trade Centre.

 

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"This is a sad, sad day for America. I just can't comprehend why this should have happened." - Shock star Tiger Woods weeping for victims of World Trade Centre, after receiving the news FBI agent protecting him.

 

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"A terrible tragedy has just befallen my nation." - An American citizen living in London after hearing the news of destruction of World Trade Centre in USA.

 

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"I know there are many of you here who have fallen face down - but listen to me, don't stay on the floor - God is a God of another chance." -  Rev. Paul Aderarasin, Lagos, Nigeria preaching in London.

 

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"Before I preach, let me call the man whom this job belong to. Mwenye hii kazi. I am just a helper. " - Rev. Grace Kariuki, Amazing Grace Ministry, Virginia USA, introducing her husband Mr. Kariuki before she preaching.  London Sept. 2001.

 

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"There is nobody male or female who is pure." - Bishop Dauglas, London, Sept. 2001.

 

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"I can't answer that kind of statement because it is below my standards." - Rev. J.M. Kitheka, Vision of Zion Ministry, London, Sept. 2001.

 

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"There is a problem with a black man everywhere but mostly in Africa. He want to sow, water and harvest. They never like to give someone else a chance. You know what I am talking about: African leaders want to die while ruling." - Rev. Francis Sarpong, CCBC, London.

 

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"I don't want people to treat me the way I was five years ago, not even the way  I was yesterday. I want you to take me the way I am now. - Dr. Odulele - Senior Pastor, Glory Bible House Church, London.

 

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"Leave John Walker to walk alone - walk with Jesus." - Evangelist Gladys Ngunyi, from Kenya preaching in London.

 

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"There are many Africans here in UK who lives as if they are still in Africa." - Pastor Kofi Marfo, London. Sept. 2001

 

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"Most of the black people don't like to read books. But for me I read books. I mean I read, read. When you read a lot it changes your paradigms." - Dr. Odulele - Senior Pastor, Glory Bible House Church, London.

 

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"Some people do things because others are doing - take care! Do it your own way."  - Rev. Grace Kariuki, Amazing Grace Ministry, Virginia USA, introducing her husband Mr. Kariuki before she preaching.  London Sept. 2001.

 

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"We are in a church and not a club. All matters should be resolved in order." - Bishop Owen, London.

 

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"When I was young, my mother told me that if someone accuses or talks about you, I should not reply." - Mrs. Kiilu, London. Sept. 2001.

 

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"In God's business it is not everything that has answers, but God knows all the answers." - Rev. Francis Sarpong, CCBC, London.

 

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"Rejoice in the Lord, I mean real rejoicing not occasional rejoicing like the London weather." - Evangelist Gladys Ngunyi, from Kenya preaching in London.

 

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"A church is like a city bus; the pastor is the bus driver. The driver has the duty to drive the bus from its beginning to its destination. The driver stops at every stage; passengers get out and others come in. The driver does not care who comes out or who goes out provided he is in control." - A church Deacon, London.

 

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"It is not easy to bring up teenagers. Those with teenagers knows what I am talking about. Sometimes you wonder: are these my children? But take my word - just trust in God and you will see the hand of God."  - Rev. Grace Kariuki, Amazing Grace Ministry, Virginia USA, introducing her husband Mr. Kariuki before she preaching.  London Sept. 2001.

 

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"Listen to me carefully, stick to your vision. Some people hijack other people's vision. You know what I mean: It is like going to a pharmacy and taking someone else's prescriptions. Go back to your vision and to your prescriptions." - Bishop T.D. Jakes, American Preacher.

 

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"I didn't get any sleep on the first night because it's so noisy. Being a city girl, I'm not used to cows, goats, geese, chickens and dogs making a racket all night, not to mention the cockerel, who has a warped sense of time. - Lynn Nestor, South London, a British woman who together with her husband and  3 children spent 10 weeks living in a hut on remote African homestead for a TV Channel 4 documentary.

 

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"I am surprised that some Kenyans in UK and especially in London don't own a computer and again they know nothing about internet technology." - Bishop Jude Muli Kiteta, Victory Vision International Church, Nairobi, Kenya preaching in London 2001. (Only about 30 per cent of Kenyans in UK own computers).

 

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"I don't have to preach a lot today. I just want to teach you that you should spend at least one hour to pray every day. Yes, a prayer is the food of your spirit. After six months of continuous prayer, ring and tell me the result. I have been there I know what I am talking about. - Rev. Matthew Ashimolowo, KICC, (biggest church in UK ) preaching at Gathering of the Champions, London August 2001.

 

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"Misterseed, we have a project for Street Children back home in Nakuru - Neema Trust - we only feed this children because our services are limited by money. But we trust God in future to do more." - Rev. King'ori, Christ Celebration Church, Nakuru, speaking in London. Email: pkwakahu@yahoo.com

 

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"We're staying at the Shongwe family's homestead. There are eight adults and 15 children who crowded round as soon as we arrived, which was a bit overwhelming. I'm worried I won't remember their names."  - Lynn Nestor, South London, a British woman who together with her husband and  3 children spent 10 weeks living in a hut on remote African homestead for a TV Channel 4 documentary.

 

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"Through music, I have become very famous and well known. I have eaten and shaken hand with every African leader including Nelson Mandela. I have made money through music. I bought everything that money can buy except an aero plane because I don't have enough parking in my backyard." - Sammy Oknzu, preacher/gospel musicians preaching in London. 19/8/01

 

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"There is limitations to what you want to become but there is no limitations for what God has purposed for you." - 24 year old Liverpool University student, Antony Kahi, London August 2001.

 

"I am not your opinion. I am God's opinion. I have a message to deliverer to the church.  I have been sent here by they Holy Spirit.  While I was seated there I asked God that if it God's message I should be invited to do so. Now that I have been invited I have no alternative but to deliver the message - SHUT UP YOU MOUTH AND COVER YOUR BROTHER OR SISTER'S NAKEDNESS. LEAVE GOD TO JUDGE THEM ACCORDINGLY." - Rev. Vanessa, London, 09/01.

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"We're back home in London and I feel like I'm living in a cupboard. There are advantages to the lifestyle on a homestead. You don't have to worry about paying the mortgage, rent or bills. I never felt threatened and the people were very welcoming and accepting. But it can be a hard life. The children couldn't go to a nearby school, there's no healthcare and HIV is a huge problem. But I miss the freedom, the space, the lack of stress and the people. It's ironic, really, as the things I miss are the things I disliked most when I got there. - Lynn Nestor, South London, a British woman who together with her husband and  3 children spent 10 weeks living in a hut on remote African homestead for a TV Channel 4 documentary.

 

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"You must be good givers. Giving out your Tithes and Offerings faithfully so that you can prosper in this country. Yes, you must bless the Lord." - Bishop Jude Muli Kiteta, Victory Vision International Church, Nairobi, Kenya preaching in London 2001.

 

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"Judge each day not by the harvest but by the seed you plant." - Rev. Irungu, Vision Gospel, London.

 

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"I have a calling to serve the Lord. I can do some other jobs and earn a lot of money but I have a calling. I have lived and preached in Canada and USA for many years. At last I decided to go back to Kenya to launch a ministry.  I don't want to talk about myself but by the time I stopped working I was among the ten Kenyans with my kind of  profession. At the end of it all I decided to serve the Lord." - Bishop Jude Muli Kiteta, Victory Vision International Church, Nairobi, Kenya preaching in London 2001.

 

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"I want you to understand that the world you see is not all what there is in the world. There is the physical world which you can and there is a spiritual world which you cannot see but very much in operation." - Rev. Steve Mensah, preaching in CCBC, London.

 

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"It is unfortunate that most of our people MAJORS with MINORS and they MINORS with the MAJORS". - Rev. Francis Mungai, Ambassadors International Chapel, London.

 

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"I've been ill with a really bad stomach.. Going to the toilet at night really scares me - I have to walk across the homestead and up a mountain to get there. I've had to wake my husband Robert up every half an hour to come with me. Every time I closed my eyes I had a vision of my children falling into the toilet - it's a 10ft cesspit in a hut halfway up a mountain. You have to perch on a wall to go to the toilet and I've made my children promise they'll never go to toilet without a adult. - Lynn Nestor, South London, a British woman who together with her husband and  3 children spent 10 weeks living in a hut on remote African homestead for a TV Channel 4 documentary.

 

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"Tell your neighbour that we are going. Yes, we are visitors on this world. Remind yourself and your neighbour that we are going and we are going......." - Evangelist Jacob Kuria, preaching in London.

 

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"I have to finish now. I know time is far much gone. I have to come some other time to finish my message. What time does your matatu finish? - Bishop Jude Muli Kiteta, Victory Vision International Church, Nairobi, Kenya preaching in London 2001. It was 1025 p.m. by then.

 

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"Don't send all your money back home and leave yourself with nothing. You have to live good, you have to dress and eat well. Treat yourself. Yours is what you wear and eat". – Pastor Isaac nicknamed Bonnke of  IW Revival Church, London.

 

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"If there is anybody who is qualified to talk about poverty, it's me. I have come from far. I mean from such a poor family. If you look at my head, I don't have hair, it is a lifetime sign of poverty that I was brought up with. I used to distribute several baskets of bread in the morning before going to school. - what are you talking about, what are you saying. I mean poverty." - Rev. Matthew Ashimolowo, KICC, (biggest church in UK ) preaching at CCBC,  July 2001.

 

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"Life is not a competition". - Bishop Jude Muli Kiteta, Victory Vision International Church, Nairobi, Kenya preaching in London 2001.

 

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"It is a sad affair that some Kenyans in UK bought their ticket to come to UK for £700 and they buy the returning ticket for only £5". - Sam Ochieng, Kenya Community Support Network, describing how serious drink-driving situation is with Kenyans in UK. Most of them had been deported for drink-driving, having spent £5 to buy alcohol.

 

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"Women are good in sensing, yes, we men come last." - Rev. Steve Mensah, preaching in CCBC, London.

 

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"I expect to see smiling faces in the church this afternoon. We are in the church of God - where the joy of the Lord is in its fullness'. - Pastor James Kirika, Discipleship Christian Centre, London.

 

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"You must have a sense of expectations." - Pastor James Kimani, preaching in London.

 

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"Days are going, it is only the other day that I want smartly black haired young man. Today my hair has turned almost grey;  in fact these days I don't look myself twice in the mirror.- Evangelist Jacob Kuria, preaching in London.

 

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"In every coming, there is a going and we have no choice who comes and who goes."– Pastor Isaac nicknamed Bonnke of  IW Revival Church, London.

 

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"Encourage yourself and your children to study, you black people. There are many opportunities coming up in this countries especially in IT industry. I have a member in my church who two years ago had nothing. He went back to school as he was working and today he is one of the most highly paid person among our church members with a monthly salary of £170,000 (about KSh. 20 million) per year. What can I tell you...... we have several on that category."- Rev. Matthew Ashimolowo, KICC, (biggest church in UK ) preaching at CCBC,  July 2001.

 

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"....the tongue.....is an unruly evil, FULL OF DEADLY POISON." - James 3:8

 

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"As a young boy, my mother used to teach us about Job in the Bible. We really used to sympathise with Job especially how he lost his children." – Pastor Isaac nicknamed Bonnke of  IW Revival Church, London, explaining that sometimes we don't suffer because we have sinned.

 

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"I don't feel to preach this morning, I feel to worship God this morning - someone help me worship God this morning." - Rev. Francis Sarpong, CCBC, London, Sunday Service, July 2001.

 

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"God responds to SEEDS not NEEDS." - Rev. Matthew Ashimolowo, KICC, preaching at CCBC,  July 2001.

 

"If a woman wants to be a queen in her house, she must first make the husband the king." - Pastor Owusu, CCBC, London officiating a wedding ceremony July 2001.

 

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"My one purpose in life is to help people find a personal relationship with God, which, I believe, comes through knowing Christ." -- Billy Graham, American Preacher.

 

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"If Kenyans were to abstain from sex for two years, it would help save a generation." - President Moi address a Pharmaceutical Society of Kenya seminar.

 

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"The government has invested a lot of money for community development in many different sectors in this country. Many communities has really benefited from these projects. I don't know why Kenyan community is not interested with these projects." - Sam Ochieng, Kenya Community Support Network, describing how other communities in UK have benefited. (e.g. Ugandans in London were given £200,000 to help them fight Aids, no Kenyan applied for it).

 

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"If you cannot survive 3 months without a job, count yourself as poor." - Rev. Matthew Ashimolowo, KICC, (biggest church in UK) preaching at CCBC,  July 2001.

 

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"You cannot present your first impression twice." - Charles Muhindi - a teacher/writer, London.

 

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"That is, unless they befriend those guards and these warders. Then that officer in charge. Then the kadogos (jail informers). All in all it's not an inexpensive visit, so they better come prepared." - Visitors visiting Kenyans jails - Daily Nation July 2001.

 

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"They have to bring my letters to the airport, I cannot wait to go home." - Rev. Matthew Ashimolowo, KICC, (biggest church in UK - he goes abroad almost every fortnight) preaching at CCBC,  July 2001.

 

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"How did Noah in the Ark in the Old Testament differentiate a male and female snakes except by the anointing of the Holy Ghost." - Pastor Dominic Roche (FEM - Nairobi Kenya), preaching at CCBC Swahili Service, London.

 

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"Enemies does to you better than friends". - Rev. Matthew Ashimolowo, KICC,  preaching at CCBC,  July 2001.

 

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"There are some people in your life who try to destroy and criticise anything you are trying to built in your life."  - Rev. Francis Sarpong, CCBC, London, Sunday Service, July 2001.

 

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"There are 46 registered political parties in Kenya today". - Hon. Ndicho, MP for Juja - speaking in London July 2001.

 

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"When you are blessed, they say it is witchcraft, yes, tell them it is God's craft." - Pastor Dominic Roche (FEM - Nairobi Kenya), preaching at CCBC, London, July 2001.

 

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"The judge behaved like an accountant. It is not for a judge to take accounts; it is not the job of a judge to be an accountant." - Three Appeal Court judges criticising Judge J. O'Kubasu, for reducing a cabinet minister's NBK loan from Sh.100 million to Sh.33 million. (D. Nation).

 

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"It's not yet time to see visitors, go back or I'll use force." - A jail warder in Kenya telling and old woman who had come to see his only son - a robbery suspect.

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"Today is Father's Day, a Good Father instructs, disciplines, love and protects his family." - Rev. Francis Sarpong, CCBC, London on father's day.

 

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"When I talk of poverty, I qualify to talk about it. We were so poor that when when I went near a bank an alarm would would have set off." - Rev. Matthew Ashimolowo, KICC, (biggest church in UK) preaching at CCBC,  July 2001.

 

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"Fanya biashara mpaka nirundi, biashara ya kuendesha injili. Bwana Yesu atauliza, biashara yako umefikisha wapi?" - Pastor Peter Njuguna, preaching in London in June 2001.

 

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"The warder is busy warding off visitors, who are pleading for glimpses of their kin. When all the visitors are a distance away, each is given a minute by the warder to state their case. The more money one is willing to produce, the faster the service. The elderly are slower in attracting attention and most miss out." - Daily Nation referring to jail warders in Kenya.

 

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"Oh yes, I agree President Moi is a Professor for politics, in fact he should be higher than a Professor." - Hon. Ndicho, MP for Juja - speaking in London July 2001.

 

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"The Constitutional Review has been derailed by several factors back home in Kenya, among them is Ugali ya Usiku at State House."  – Samson Ochola, KMDJ, Vice-Chairman.

 

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"I am glad to be here today. I am also happy to see the Kenya flag next to the United Nations flag. I think Kenya will unit all nations of the world." - Pastor Dominic Roche (FEM - Nairobi Kenya), preaching at CCBC Swahili Service, London.

 

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"You can borrow someone else's shoe but you cannot borrow someone else's character." - Rev. Steve Asanti, Ghana, preaching in CCBC, London.

 

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"I didn't think there were any honest people left in the world." - David Beckham, English Footballer after getting his lost wallet back.

 

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"Kenneth Matiba owes Barclays bank of Kenya KSh.1.2 billion, the Barclays Bank is now demanding that money back from Matiba. At the same time some senior politicians in Kenya owes several banks billions of money which are far much more than Bw. Matiba, why are the banks not demanding these money." - Ngethe, Chairman, London, June 2001.

 

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"Even if the British pound is so powerful, you should not sell your salvation for the pound." - Pastor Peter Njuguna, preaching in London in June 2001

 

 

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"Thousands of prisoners (some condemned two decades ago) are still living from day to day in Kenya's maximum security prisons. None knows when death will come." - Daily Nation referring to conditions in Kenyan jails July 2001.

 

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"God never promotes you beyond your level of obedience." - Rev. Matthew Ashimolowo, KICC,  preaching at CCBC,  July 2001.

 

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"Everything you do in your life needs commitment and especially in the house of God." - Pastor James Kirika, Discipleship Christian Centre, London.

 

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"We Kenyans have missed a step  here in UK, we have become destroyers of each other - God help us."  - Evangelist Tee, London, June 2001.

 

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"The Holy Spirit has not given-up on England." - Pastor Dominic Roche (FEM - Nairobi Kenya), preaching at CCBC Swahili Service, London.

 

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"Be careful fathers, you know when an African man says to his wife 'I love you' his sisters thinks you are stupid." - Rev. Francis Sarpong, CCBC, London on father's day.

 

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"They want to tie the election issue to the Change of Constitution issue in order to extend the life of the current parliament." - Hon. Ndicho, MP for Juja - speaking in London July 2001.

 

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"I cannot return to Kenya until it is fully democratic." - Ngugi wa Thiong'o, now living in USA.

 

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"Please tell me I am smart, I need someone to tell me that I am smart." - Raphael (FEM) dressed as best man in a wedding, London July 2001.

 

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"The tongue is very vital to our lives as human beings. As a physical organ, it helps us to taste and speak. In the spiritual sense, the tongue controls our destiny, regardless of our status as Christians or unbelievers." - Dr. Heward-Mills, The Mega Church, Ghana.

 

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"We work hard, but we don't work smart." - Rev. Matthew Ashimolowo, KICC, preaching at CCBC,  July 2001.

 

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"You have to learn to pursue your goal." - Pastor James Kimani, preaching in London.

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